Eric Harris is, more or less, a household name throughout the continental United States and Canada. If you don't know who he is, you've been living under a rock, or packing fudge. Or shoving rocks into your ass. Anyways, here's a link for the morons. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eric_Harris_and_Dylan_Klebold
He was a fan of comedy, and here are some of his more memorable jokes - the page is titled "JO MAMMA!", and the jokes listed are quite humorous. My brother, Tyler, and I, are also fans of comedy - but not Eddie Murphy. So we decided to use Eric Harris' jokes as a "starting block", persay, but whiten it up a little bit. Like that Listerine with whitening shit. Here are the original, or "OG" jokes.
http://acolumbinesite.com/eric/mama.html
Here is a compounded list of our own.
The J is used to denote jokes made by myself, Justin.
The T does the same. Except the person in reference is Tyler.
If a J/T appears, those are jokes which were created by both participants.
Oh, and the A stands for Amander, Tyler's girlfriend.
Your mother is so fancy she uses accentey gous on "e"s that don't need accenty gous. - J
Your mother is so short that she needs to drink very small quantities of alcohol to feel it... Because she IS so short. - T
Your mother once caught a fish. - J
Your mother smokes cigarettes so often that she started ignoring the warning on the packages...Even though she knows the warning on the packages of cigarettes are for her own good... She ignores them... Because she likes smoking cigarettes... With warnings on the packages. - J
Your mother is so good at playing super smash bros. that she can beat three level nine donkey kongs sometimes... Because she plays super smash bros. so often. - T
Your mother is a history buff. - J
Your mother once made her young nephew watch Thomas the Tank Engine because the channel told her the series was "informational and educational"...And she thought your little cousin could use some more intelligence... Because he was three, and, like, stupid and stuff. - J
Your mother once pretended to jack off a can of Pepsi and then opened the tab and it sprayed foam everywhere... And it led the audience to the impression that your mother is good at giving hand jobs. - J
Your mother is such a pyromaniac that sometimes she plays with matches... And makes videos of them... And puts them on YouTube. -T
Your mother watches the discovery channel so much that she knows what scutum is. - T
Your mothers tendons are formed just right, so it seems that she has superhuman strength... When really she doesn't... She just has extra leverage... That other's don't. - T
Your mother is such a race traitor that she talked to a nigger at work once... And didn't even hate it. - T
Your mother was in karate when she was younger. - T
Your mother plays bass and is able to learn most songs by ear... Even really hard Necrophagist ones. - J
Your mother is so curious she inquired about your camping trip last week. - T
Your mother remembers the Pokedex so well that she knows the height and weight of Aerodactyl... Which is 5'11" and 130.1 lbs. - J/T
Your mother once googled her name... And she found out that there are famous people who share her name. - J
Your mother likes microphones so much that she talks into plastic bottles sometimes... And pretends that they are microphones. - T
Your mothers lattimus dorsi are so strong she can do lateral pulldowns very easily... With lots of weight. - T
Your mother wears sashes... And keeps her mana potions in them... And sometimes the red health potions... But only if she's running low on health. - J/T
Your mother was once possessed by satan, and I'm like "What's up baby?" and she's like ENNGHHHH in a demonic voice. - J
Your mother is so into Celtic culture that she got a Celtic tattoo. - T
Your mother thinks Mark Hamill, who played Luke Skywalker in the Star Wars series (1977-1983) is hot. - J
Your mother is so dirty that one time she tried to poo, but she couldnt... And she wiped anyway. -T
Your mother is such a pack-rat, that she collects nazi memorabilia... and coins! -T
Your mother read up on weird stuff that could happen to your asshole when you try to shit or fart... And then was terrified to shit or fart. - J
Your mother's pants are so old that she's starting to get crotch holes... In the crotch. And people do have sex with her... Because she's a whore. - T
Your mother can use both sets of vocal chords to speak. - J
Your mother makes a pretty mean rice cake. - T
Your mother likes Rock Band. - T
Your mother is so handy, that she can do drywall very well. -T
Your mother was up late one night huffing glue and passed out. When she awoke, she was bound by the feet. - J
Your mother is so lame that she watched Brokeback Mountain... Twice. - A
Your mother once said "once you go black, you never go back" before she fucked a black guy... And the experience was so terrible that she went back... To white guys. - J
Your mother likes Halloween so much, she dresses up for the occasion... even though shes at least 40 years old... and Halloween is for children -T